GIVE ME THESE! WE SHALL HAVE A HOGWARTS PARTY AND I WILL GET DRUNK!
(Source: hogwats-para-meiosangues)
Via Lucifer's Flowers
“Mom, Dad, I’m gay.”
“Ok… so do you want pizza for dinner or just McDonalds?”“Mom….I’m…”
“Gay. Yeah.”
“You knew?”
“I ship you and your best friend.”
“Ship?”
“I ship it.”
“Well…We’re dating. Is it fine?”
“Does he like reading?”
“Yeah. He read all those old books you liked when you were a kid. You know that series about those Greek god kids and wizards and that boy who bakes a lot and that-“
“You have my permission to marry him. Now let’s go to Disneyland.”“Mam, I’m gay.”
“OH SWEET FUCKING JESUS THANK YOU GOD YOU HAVE GRACED ME WITH MUCH IN THIS LIFE BUT NEVER HAVE I BEEN SO BLESSED AS TO HAVE A GAY CHILD THANK YOU ARE A MERCIFUL AND WISE LORD I GIVE YOU THANKS AND PRAISE AMEN.”“Mommy… I’m gay.”
“That’s great, baby!”
“H-huh?”
“Baby, you know that I support love in every form. And so does your dad. We love you always and forever. As long as your partner doesn’t abuse or use you, then I’m perfectly happy.”
“Mama, I’m gay.”
*gets on knees and praises the lord
“Wait, what’s going on.”
“I’m thanking God for the perfect son/daughter he gave me.”
“Mum, I’m gay”
“Oh my gosh thats so great! Do you have a boyfriend? Is he cute? When can I meet him? Tell me all about him! I’m already planning your wedding”
“Mom I”m gay”
*smiles* “That’s great”
“You’re not mad”
“No, I”m just glad you didn’t have to lie to us about it”
“Hey Moms, I’m gay”
“Hey Mom, I’m Gay”
“Okay dear, but still the same rules with dating as anything else.”
“Wait.. What?”
“You heard me, When you go out on your dates i want you back by 12”
“Okay then..”“Mom… I’m gay.”
“Go to your room.”
“I thought you’d accept me—”
“I do. Pack your bags, we’re going on a vacation.” /cue hugs“Dad… I’m <not straight>.”
“Oh, that’s all? I thought you’d failed maths or something. Here, have a cookie.”“So….yeah, mom.”
“Okay. Do you want to go to Five Guys?”
“I’m gay”
“Okay.”
“Is that it?”
“What, were you expecting me to get you fast food or something? We just got McDonalds for lunch. We can’t be eating out all the time. I don’t know why everyone keeps giving their gay children fast food as if its a reward for coming out. We’re eating what was planned for dinner, regardless of your sexual orientation.”
“But I hate spaghetti!”
“So do I, son, so do I”
“Then why are we eating it?”
“Because we don’t have anything left in the house, the car’s out of gas, and your mother won’t be home for another hour.”“Maaaaaaaaan. Can’t we order a pizza or something?”
“No.”
“But daaaaaaaad.”
“I SAID NO. Now unless you can find something else in the kitchen we can have for dinner we’re having spaghetti.”
“How about Pop Tarts”
“…okay fuck it, lets eat the Pop Tarts.”
“DIBS ON WILDBERRY”“FUCK”
…what was I typing about again?
“Mom, I have something to tell you.”
“Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God…. What is it?” *cringe*
“I… I’m gay.”
“….Oh! Is that it? God, I was bracing myself for something scary!”
“Mom, I’m gay.”
“Okay.”
“What?”
“Kid, I don’t care if you’re gay. Just don’t get your ass landed in jail and we’re cool, okay?”
“Uh… kay.”
“Mom, I’m gay.”
“GTK, dude. You want your club t-shirt now or…?”
“Mom I’m gay”
Mom says nothing because she is actually a bear and stands up on her hind legs as she lets out a mighty growl then devours half of the hover-couch and jumps out the window and onto a hover-unicycle to go work at her job as a receptionist at Scotia Bank.
OH GOD WHAT ^^^^ FHJASDFHLJASHDL
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.” — Marilyn Monroe.
I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!! WHY DID I LET MYSELF FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU I HATE YOU I WANT TO BE HAPPY BUT YOU WONT LET ME I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU AND I HOPE SHE BREAKS YOUR HEART LIKE YOU BROKE MINE YOU MOTHER FUCKING BASTERD BURN IN HELL
“Before our white brothers arrived to make us civilized men, we didn’t have any kind of prison. Because of this, we had no delinquents. Without a prison, there can be no delinquents. We had no locks nor keys and therefore among us there were no thieves.When someone was so poor that he couldn’t afford a horse, a tent or a blanket, he would, in that case, receive it all as a gift. We were too uncivilized to give great importance to private property. We didn’t know any kind of money and consequently, the value of a human being was not determined by his wealth. We had no written laws laid down, no lawyers, no politicians, therefore we were not able to cheat and swindle one another.We were really in bad shape before the white men arrived and I don’t know how to explain how we were able to manage without these fundamental things that (so they tell us) are so necessary for a civilized society.” — John (Fire) Lame Deer, Sioux Lakota, 1903-1976.
Historically depressing yet deeply inspirational.
- I think everybody should have their very own little button for when they are sad
- And when they press it
- A balloon should come down from the sky
- With a basket of kittens and fluffy fanfiction of their OTP
- And then they won’t be sad anymore
That would be amzing right now
I cried over you again tonight someone asked why we broke up and all the memories came flooding back
About me
My actual thoughts my true feelings and and everything in between this is a look inside the mind of the girl with the perfect smile
